I better get the life update out of the way, I cannot trust myself to stay focused enough to turn this into a daily blog beyond brief stints. This may be a meandering blog post as many are, because I write this on the battlefield, actively engaged in the struggles of life, not on some plush couch having made it through and seeing all the bad shit as a distant retrospective memory, the artillery is falling and mud flying as I type this, I have little time as my time should be rather invested in things that make me money right now. With that stressy depressy intro out of the way let’s get on with the update!

Can no longer rent cars from Enterprise and Avis

For the bad news, I recieved a bill from Enterprize car rental

Really bad news because this is the second car rental company I will be black listed from as there is no way I can pay this bill right now. I was first put on the do not rent list by Avis back in 2022, this is before I went homeless and moved in with my father, it was either that or move into the Dallas homeless shelter, something to this day I wonder if would have worked out better for me then moving into my fathers. As moving into my fathers in the middle of nowhere with nearly zero transportation and really bad internet kinda seems like a wasted year of life and not the slingshot pullback I was hoping on. Again, problems due mostly to my own design. Before going completely homeless I was really in my feelings in Dallas back in 2022, my divorce was still effecting me even though I had initiated it, the girl who I really liked and had lost all my money helping her and her son by moving them into my apartment, taking her son to daycare, was missing other men at the front door, partying in my apartment while I was working, and sneaking men into her room during the night. I really liked that girl, and due to circumstances I rushed into moving her in with me. Despite it all, and realizing what I was to her, I stuck it out as long as I could until I ran out of money. The relationship with her broke me pretty bad, since then I will never allow a female into my head the way I did before, I will never put so much effort into something so worth leaving, life can make us cynical and I’m no angel through it all. Before homelessness I ate $100 a night in food, drove with the gas peddle stuck to the floor hoping to die and not hurt someone else. It was really bad, and something a lot of us go through.

Anyway I’m getting off track, in my town there are only three rental company’s, Avis, Enterprize and Hertz, if I cannot rent with Hertz for some reason, I may be forced to get a factory job, or really any kind of difficult job that is high paying. I want a good trade for my time into money, and I do this for however long, until I have saved enough money to rent, because I left my apartment abruptly and have bad credit I may have to pay many months in advance to secure an apartment up front, by basic furniture and cooking ware, I may need to buy a car, insurance will be sky high for me especially if I buy a new car. Onlyfans obviously does no make me enough to live off of it full time, and it probably never will as I am a straight male and are not able to perform gay sex that my fans some of who have become friends want to see. If I’m working a factory job you can best bet the 5 hours a day of free time are split between the gym and trying to escape the rat race, I do agree with the idea that rock bottom can create champions, just through the pure stress of trying to escape the pain of an unfulfilling lifestyle. When it’s rock bottom there is no choice for an unhappy person, it’s either learn a skill and get good at it or be stuck at bottom forever. It’s honestly a place I’m sure some middle class people envy because they are too fearful to surrender there comfort for fulfillment that comes at the edge of a sharp blade. Currently I’m staying with a friend, I’m really thankful for he and his gf helping me during this time, I want to do them proud and for them to see me get out of this situation and know they had a hand in it. And someday I would look to pay it back to them, they would have me in their debt. They let me use their home and car, however there is a timeline attached, this month I will talk to Hertz car rental and see if I can get a car and baby the heck out of it.

The Enterprise bill explained

All the way back in May I lost a rental car due to hydro lock while working Uber eats one particular rainy night in Dallas Texas. I was driving down the road early morning pouring rain, when the car shut down and began to roll backwards down the hill I was climbing, this was in a neighborhood so there was not too much danger of being hit. I put on my emergency blinkers and contacted the customer as I was literally just one block away from their house, at the time I was working in a financial deficit, my week work week had just started and this would be the night that would have balanced out my finances, as I had just left my fathers house 2 days before dumping all my money into the rental car. The drive from Fayetteville Arkansas to Dallas Texas is $50 and a half tank gone around a $200 loss when working solitary weeks, something I have to be mindful of while working. It’s a better to work multiple weeks, because of my secured credit card I am capped at $1,300 $200-300 going into a deposit before renting, allowing me a maximum of around 3 weeks before having to lay over while my credit line updates, assuming my Uber venture was profitable. As I type this I am in the same situation I’ve been in all year, starting over from nearly $0 Onlyfans being my primary source of income. The reason I go at it so hard is because it swung right and can save a lot more money faster than I could at just about any job. Around $100 could be hypothetically saved a day if I refrain on my eating out, which is difficult to do when hungry. That being said I’m getting impatient, and will spring for a job if this keeps up much longer. This time I’m very confident that when I go out I will be profitiable, outside of circumstances I cannot control like weather and car accidents. The last time I was out, I got caught up in a tornado outbreak that had me bouncing from northwest Arkansas to Dallas and all the way down to Austin Texas after the same storm broke out in Dallas knocking infrastructure offline not allowing me to carry on Uber as normal. Anyway, all this to explain why after the car broke down I sought help from a local mechanic in attempting to repair the car.
After the car shut down I had my customer come to me to pick up their food, I explained I could not walk the food to them in the downpour because I would be abandoning the car in the middle of the road. They offered me to stay in their house for the night after hearing I was working out of state I politely declined of course, they pulled away and another car approached me, as it turned out the driver was a young mechanic, he lived around the corner and told me I could use his bathroom and we could look at the car tommorow, he lived just around the corner. After he pulled away I got to work getting the car off the hill, the rain was in a downpour that was not scheduled to let up for another 3 hours, I was tired and eager to sleep to see what the morning brings. I stepped out into an ankle deep waterfall, gathered towels from the trunk, my showers towels, and placed them all along the door paneling. Digging my feet Inyo the slippery alphsalt I begin to push the car up the hill, lighting and thunder booming, sweat mixed with rain stinging my eyes, eventually I was able to get the car to the young mechanics house, laboriously pushing and steering the car beside his house. I sheepishly rung his doorbell and asked to use the bathroom, he offered for me to stay the night in the house, I declined saying the car would be fine. The rainy night was cold, I was soaked to the bone, I covered myself in what dry towels I had left, laid the seat back and tried to sleep. That night was the first night that I became seriously concerned I may develop hypothermia. I was cold and shaking, my clothes were soaking into the seats, the towels quickly became wet from my body, I took melontonin pills and passed out until morning, feeling completely alone and stressed. The next morning I woke up to a sunny day and foggy windows. I tried the car and it would still not start, I asked to use the young man’s shower, felt good to be in dry clothes after spending an entire night soaking wet and cold.

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